Yeah I was like 5 and she was 3 when we took that pic tee hee.
I felt particularly handsome today. So much so, that I borrowed my friend’s phone to take some mirror selfies. (My phone’s camera doesn’t work since it got run over.)
I’m so sick of hookah. I’m always down for it but when I start smoking I’m like what the fuck ? Why is this the recreational activity of choice? I hate it but I love it. But I’m trying to be healthy and get my stamina up, so I gotta stop with that shit. Gotta find new things to do. Like play pool maybe. Or go to a karaoke place!! I’ve never been, and have always wanted to. What else? I’d rather go to a bar than hookah. But I’m trying to stop drinking. But I love drinking. But it’s frowned upon. But I love drinking. I should really stop… But I love drinking…. Eh. Lions shouldn’t lose sleep over the opinion of sheep. I’m going to sleep. Fucking sheep.
Iunno I really like my hair after blow drying it fresh out the shower.
I’ve stopped drinking. And I deleted/privated/stopped using all other social media besides tumblr. I want to be off the grid. I’m done with everyone and everything. I just hope I don’t relapse, and have the strength to stick to all this.
Why’d I have to go through all those pics
Falling asleep next to me
My sister had this friend in junior high school that she lost touch with once they went to different high schools. About 3 years ago she messaged my sister saying she’s the only person she can talk to, and went on to tell my sister about her plans for suicide. She told her of all the things she’s been going through, and how she’s going to jump in the ocean after getting drunk so she has the guts to go through with it. My sister of course tried to talk her out of it, told her things will get better, even met up with her to talk things out. They talked about the old times and how much fun they had. She told my sister she will definitely talk to her one last time. That one last time never came. A few days later the police showed up at my sister’s school to say that the girl is missing, and that she was the last person the girl had spoken to. My sister told them everything, scared for the worst. They told her not to worry, she’ll be fine. Even I told her don’t worry, she’s probably out there living her life away from all her problems and the bullshit she was going through. Fast forward to today, my sister just found out from the girl’s twin brother that her body was found last year in the ocean… She actually went through with it. I’m so shocked and numb. I never imagined her dead. I wanted to find out she was away from her problems and living a happy life. I didn’t want to hear that she’s dead. I didn’t think she’d do it. It brought back the memories of my own depression at that time, and the numerous times I would stand on the rocks at the beach thinking how beautiful the water looks, thinking about just jumping in, thinking about letting go. I never had the guts to do it. I can only imagine how much worse she had it, that she actually went ahead and ended her life. I remember seeing her in high school, she was 2 years my junior. I never thought anything of her. Just another freshman. I think, what if I had talked to her? Became friends with her? Listened to her problems? Let her ease her aching heart by pouring some of it out? How lonely does someone have to be to seek out their junior high school friend they haven’t seen nor spoken to in years, as their only source of companionship? The only person they can open up to? Be nice to everyone around you. We humans are so hostile to one another, rather than being friendly to everyone around us. If we were friends with everyone around us, if we tried to relate to everyone we saw and interacted with, if we were just NICE to each other, this world would be such a less lonely place. It’s a fucked up world we live in. Why does everyone insist on making it worse for themselves and everyone around them? You never know what someone is going through. My heart goes out to you. I hope you’re in a better place. RIP.
Honestly man it’s beautiful when it snows but it’s us humans who make it dirty and brown and turn it to wet slush. Then we complain about it being messy. (at Prospect Park)
Look at how the ice formed on these windows. Nature, man.
Hey guys I took a pic completely naked wanna see okay here you go
awww how old is that pic? you look so young